The lazy traveller’s guide to hiking Mount Sinai

“We’re both visibly relieved when I decide to take the lazy way out and get a camel; by far, my favourite thing about hiking Mount Sinai. It allows me to experience Dahab with my body without taking a toll on it.”

This story is for people like me, lazy travellers who’ll try everything as long as it’s not physically demanding.

It starts with a stroll along the corniche in Dahab, the Egyptian coastal town famous for diving and infamous for its taste for marijuana.

The corniche is where Dahab, the tourist destination, turns into a melting pot of restaurants, cafés, perfume shops and souvenirs manned by people who refuse to take no for an answer. Egyptians are persistent.

In Dahab, one of the most laid-back places in the country - persistence is in overdrive. Touts want me to buy perfumes, tea, incense sticks, tie-dye harem pants, homemade ice cream, fried ice cream, swimwear, diving and snorkelling gear, massages, facials and even a seafood platter.

It’s my first few moments in Dahab. I want to soak up its energy, so I keep walking until I see a placard daring me to dive in the Blue Hole (no), travel to Petra and Jerusalem (no time) or hike Mount Sinai to catch the sunrise at the exact spot where Moses from the Bible collected the 10 Commandments.

I’m not religious. But I love a good story, factual or legendary - I guess I’m going to hike the Holy Mountain. I don’t hike, and the closest I’ve been to exercising is having a partner who enjoys it. But I am nothing if not a delusional traveller. So I will myself into being excited; after all, I’m going to retrace Moses’ steps in one of the most historic journeys ever made. In any case, the tour company says that it’s an easy climb and I have four days to get ready. I spend them snorkelling around Dahab and getting my body prepared for the climb through relaxing, full-body massages.

Faking it to the top

Arriveth 10 pm on Friday, arriveth the hour of departure to St Catherine, about two hours from Dahab, giving me six hours to get to the top of the mountain. You can make the trip as part of a tour group or hire a private guide. Trips can also be organised from Sharm El Sheik and be done in the afternoon to catch the sunset. I use King Safari Dahab.

My backpack has several cans of Red Bull and chocolate bars I’ll use as a reward to keep myself going. Arrival: It’s quiet, but the air is thick with excitement. There’s a handful of boys selling water, batteries, and torches.

Time to get going, our hasty guide tells us. We are a group of two friends visiting from Cairo, four American students on their last big trip in Egypt, and a mother, daughter and son trio that looks as bewildered as I am by their choice. The mother is wearing a full face of makeup.

The walk from the parking lot to the mountain base doesn’t take long, maybe 10 minutes even, but I’m already breathless and over this hike. I’m already falling behind the group as well. Our guide is unimpressed with my speed, but he can’t take issue with me. After all, he’s the one who arrived more than an hour late to the pickup point in Dahab.

Even so, we’re both visibly relieved when I decide to take the lazy way out and get a camel; by far, my favourite thing about hiking Mount Sinai. It allows me to experience Dahab with my body without taking a toll on it. We spend a few minutes haggling over the price until we settle on EP 200. The camel is slow and burned by my weight, according to its keeper. Still, it perseveres. It’s a long and slow climb. The camel keeps giving up and stopping. Its minder loses it with me for being overweight. I’m getting over my fear of camels, and I don’t know where I am going: I let him run his mouth.

When we finally get to the end of this leg of our trip, we find an impatient guide waiting for me. There’s less than an hour to go before the sun comes - there’s no way I’ll make it past the 700 stairs everyone has to climb to get to the peak whether they walk or use a camel. “The next best thing,” he says, grabbing my phone, “Is to get pictures for you.”

He melts into the darkness. I miss out on seeing the chapel with the remains of the rock the ten commandments were written on, but the sunrise is still spectacular. I watch it from a stoep outside a cafe/restaurant where camel minders wait for their clients.

Some will say I haven’t hiked the Sinai. My answer is: why hike the Sinai when you can fake it to the top? The views are just as great, and they will not come with the scratches that the rest of my travel group comes back with.

Before you go…

Bring your passport. There is a roadblock and passport checkpoint on the way to St Catherine.
Carry cash. There are kiosks dotted along the hiking trails.
Explore St Catherine’s monastery. It’s one of the oldest working monasteries in the world and home to Moses’ burning bush and an impressive collection of religious artefacts.